Comments on: Negative Self Talk for Writers: Personalizing http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/ Writing Career Center Tue, 16 Mar 2010 13:13:51 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Jeanne Dininni http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/comment-page-1/#comment-205307 Jeanne Dininni Sat, 02 Aug 2008 23:02:37 +0000 http://www.poewar.com/?p=4319#comment-205307 Sorry about that, John! While I often use such humor, myself, I don't always "get it" when others use it! The previous sentence should have given me a clue! Sorry about that, John! While I often use such humor, myself, I don’t always “get it” when others use it! The previous sentence should have given me a clue!

]]> By: John Hewitt http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/comment-page-1/#comment-205288 John Hewitt Sat, 02 Aug 2008 21:36:18 +0000 http://www.poewar.com/?p=4319#comment-205288 @ Ultra Some commentators get very upset when you delete their comments. This can sometimes make a situation worse because then they come back, with "friends". @ Jeanne The "friends" part was actually an attempt at humor. @ Ultra

Some commentators get very upset when you delete their comments. This can sometimes make a situation worse because then they come back, with “friends”.

@ Jeanne

The “friends” part was actually an attempt at humor.

]]> By: Jeanne Dininni http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/comment-page-1/#comment-205277 Jeanne Dininni Sat, 02 Aug 2008 20:38:34 +0000 http://www.poewar.com/?p=4319#comment-205277 Forgot to mention that I do try not to take negative blog comments personally--though I also find that, when you treat your commenters with respect, friendliness, and goodwill, focusing on them and their thoughts, ideas, and concerns--your blog's comments tend to be overwhelmingly positive. At Writer's Notes, I try to only accentuate my own personal reaction to a comment when that comment is positive and/or complimentary. I then let my commenter know how much I appreciate the kind words. In the opposite case, I try to remain philosophical and <i>not</i> personalize the comment, focusing instead on why the person might be responding that way and giving a balanced, objective reply. Forgot to mention that I do try not to take negative blog comments personally–though I also find that, when you treat your commenters with respect, friendliness, and goodwill, focusing on them and their thoughts, ideas, and concerns–your blog’s comments tend to be overwhelmingly positive.

At Writer’s Notes, I try to only accentuate my own personal reaction to a comment when that comment is positive and/or complimentary. I then let my commenter know how much I appreciate the kind words. In the opposite case, I try to remain philosophical and not personalize the comment, focusing instead on why the person might be responding that way and giving a balanced, objective reply.

]]> By: Jeanne Dininni http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/comment-page-1/#comment-205273 Jeanne Dininni Sat, 02 Aug 2008 20:26:43 +0000 http://www.poewar.com/?p=4319#comment-205273 John, While realistic self-assessment is always a good thing, personalizing everything is highly detrimental, not only to our own growth as people, but also to our relationships. What we really need is the objectivity and balanced perspective that allows us to see when our own actions are causing someone to react badly and when their actions have unrelated causes. In either case, we also need the wisdom to determine the best way of handling the problem. One area where I would differ with you: I would think that talking to your 13-year-old son in front of his friends would be a last resort and would hope that talking to him personally (in an honest, receptive, and non-accusatory manner) would preclude that necessity. Enjoyed this post! Jeanne John,

While realistic self-assessment is always a good thing, personalizing everything is highly detrimental, not only to our own growth as people, but also to our relationships. What we really need is the objectivity and balanced perspective that allows us to see when our own actions are causing someone to react badly and when their actions have unrelated causes. In either case, we also need the wisdom to determine the best way of handling the problem.

One area where I would differ with you: I would think that talking to your 13-year-old son in front of his friends would be a last resort and would hope that talking to him personally (in an honest, receptive, and non-accusatory manner) would preclude that necessity.

Enjoyed this post!
Jeanne

]]> By: Ultra reviewer http://www.poewar.com/negative-self-talk-for-writers-personalizing/comment-page-1/#comment-204941 Ultra reviewer Fri, 01 Aug 2008 11:47:11 +0000 http://www.poewar.com/?p=4319#comment-204941 Yes, i do the same. I try to avoid getting personalized and try to keep replies to the comments to the topic. Thats the best to avoid any hassles. But there is always a good way to deal with anger on a commentor, delete his comment! Ultra reviewers last blog post..<a href="http://www.ultrareview.net/2008/07/voodoo-envy-133-close-competitor-of.html" rel="nofollow">Voodoo Envy 133: A close competitor of MacBook Air</a> Yes, i do the same. I try to avoid getting personalized and try to keep replies to the comments to the topic. Thats the best to avoid any hassles. But there is always a good way to deal with anger on a commentor, delete his comment!

Ultra reviewers last blog post..Voodoo Envy 133: A close competitor of MacBook Air

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