Negative Self Talk for Writers: Judging human worth

Posted by John Hewitt on 8/2/2008 under Featured, Productivity, Writing |

Judging human worth occurs when you decide your self-worth or another person’s self-worth based on a single trait or behavior. I do this a lot while driving. For writers, this frequently occurs when we are analyzing our own work or work habits. When judging others, it can often come up due to jealousy, such as seeing another writer succeeding by breaking one or more of the rules that we ourselves follow.

Here is an example of judging human worth:

Poor self talk: I can’t believe that Blogger X is so popular. All he does is talk about how successful he is. “I’m famous and you can be too if you just worship me.” What a self-centered jerk. The guy sounds like a sociopath. Every post is about selling his product. Why can’t people see that I’m the one offering genuine advice, not this scumbag?

Realistic self talk: I don’t like Blogger X’s methods. His site seems to be all about self-promotion. I’m not sure why that succeeds, but I can’t really fault somebody for sticking with a plan that works for them. I am just going to have to trust that by offering genuine, useful advice, I will succeed in the long term, whether his site does well or not. Maybe a little self promotion on my part would be a good idea too.

Some ways to avoid judging human worth:

• Ask yourself whether the behavior is truly bad, or if you are just upset by its effect on you
• Understand that one behavior does not determine a person’s entire worth
• Accept that no one, including you, is without faults
• Determine what personal toll being judgmental is taking on you

Note: The terminology I am using from an excellent textbook called Stress Management for Wellness by Walt Schafer.